And you again.

When I used to dream
I dreamt of a dark abyss
and now that my dreams are gone
do I feel relieved? or left alone?

My daylight cannot give me
what I've long seeked for
and in the middle of the riddle
I've been left upon the dawn.

I've searched among the freedoms
that long ago I cared about
for that sweet sense of belonging
people need along their path.

So my soul's broke into pieces?
So my body's tired of the fight?
So my aches are my executioners?
all looses meaning in your sight.

You shall see myself renewed
from the pain I shall arise
you have given me new hope
a new dream to walk on by.

With you

As the daylight breaks into this glass
the warmth of your lips falls down on my heart
he acking for you belongs to the past
of mind, and rain, and ghosts, and masks.

You're going down a road
that you can't go back now
so behold! because my love
will keep you by my side.

And when I weep you shall stay
and when you fall I shall pray
I'll be yours, you'll be mine
and our stars we shall enlight.

I'll embrace the dark dark night
now with you inside my mind
and our faith will trully mend
every second, every step.

it is always about someone

and yet again
the craters that my tear rivers left
do not feel as real
as this fear
of going on without myself

who knows if it's about someone?
a friend told me it is always that way
but I do not dare believe it
'cause who would I be then?

so what is left for me?
despair? hope? anger? joy?
when that someone is on the horizon
untouchable, cold
like a shadow writing upon my soul

it is always about someone
but all I want to do
is let go.

My language towards you. To you, W.

My grammar is fading
my vocabulary not flowing
I'm around you!

My syntax just left me
and my phonology is playing
its dirty tricks on me
I'm with you!

The psycholinguistics of my soul
are heading to your heart
seeking comfort, peace, love
the ones I never had.

And my language is naming yu
my words already love you
my thoughts are already yours
I'm with you!

I'm with you
my language is yours
and now this wild world
is merrier for you!

A mad woman

A mad woman is writing nonsense
like bird that forgot how to fly
but is twisting around
smashing into pieces
what it had as a hope.

This mad woman doesn’t care
about what life has for her
she just keeps on waiting
for her turn to be free.

A mad woman is searching
in never-ending fields of joy
the flower
that will never be hers.

This mad woman is reading
what seems to be a poem
praying for the open arms
that she never gave.

And I’m that mad woman
that doesn’t know about north or south
and beyond the mountains
seeks a new end.

Once again.

How do you come back
from disappointment?
how do you frighten away
the phantoms of your fear?
how can you live
after your heart is broken
again, and again, and again?

My freedom has been taken away
my illusions have flown far away
and all I that have left
is this pain and my regret.

And once again I lost my faith
and once again I mourn the days
when love called itself my friend
and once again it fell from grace.

How do you come back
when hell is all you got?

A form of good bye.

Step down from it
so the pain doesn't reach you
I have surrender my fear
so you can't reach my arms.

You've been there, haven't you
between the mirror
and yourself
but now it is time
to let go.

And if my voice shall be enough
I will shout away
the ghost
for me to be with you
all that I need is this.

So step down ...
from my heart.

For no reason at all... (to my someone special)

I miss your smile
even though it is not mine
but I still wonder
if you know
where I am, where I stand

I watch you from a distance
too far, so far, so cold
where you cannot hear me calling
where my desperate heart
doesn’t reach out for yours

Too dark are my nights again
and I love them too
but I have to wonder
if would you turn
and give me your smile again?
would you light up
my soul again?

I miss your smile
and somehow I miss you too
would you turn around
think of me
and save me again?

No answer for myself

Now my mind wonders
In places where I had never been before
And my thoughts search for something
That has long been gone
I have today
And what is left of a promise
I don’t want to be sad
So I won’t cry
Vanished from the future
My dreams have been
But they stayed with me
So I don’t consider them my own

And everyone would ask
Why am I this dark?
I have no answer for them
As I don’t have it for myself
What I have is today
And what is left of a promise
Of someone (or something)
That has long been gone
And that my thoughts search for
In places
Where I have never been before.

I'll write to you ... (to N)

I'll write you a poem
full of desperation
for you to notice
how much I miss you.

I'll write you a funny letter
so you can remember me
with a smile.

I'll write you a song
from my hopeless dreams
for me to show you
the way I feel.

I'll write you a novel
to tell our story to the world
I'll write you a simple note
to remind myself I'm just human
and that my heart beats stronger for you.

I'll write you anything
for you to keep me in you memory
and maybe someday
win a space in you heart
(as you have in mine).

On the street.

Walking, smiling
just going around a place
that somehow seems new to me.

I walk, I smile, I actually don't know why
is there maybe a happy thought in my mind?
or am I just fading so much
that I forgot how to look sad again?

Nevermind, people random care
and I lost the imaginary pencil
that I used to draw smiles with
so I look, and I see cloudy faces
but ahead that might be changed.

So keep on walking
(my friend NJ's advice)
and you might get somewhere
where the sun of your smile
can open new windows
from the street
to the world.

No title (yet)

the depths of your soul
light in the sky
and you're alone with me
how did we grow so apart?
why did we let it all die?
and now we're just two lost loves
that forgot how warm they were before.

I won't say that I don't miss you
that would deny the shine in my eyes
but this story has to end
before the end caughts us
in a neverending spiral
that would lead us out of the way

so would your kill it all?
would you give your back to us?
can't you see that I can't?
or would you hang on to the fantasy
that we created not too long ago
and keep dreaming
with a desirable end?

you're the one that would give a name
to this story,
so tell me
what's it going to be?